Building self-trust
You know what you feel…until someone else makes you question it.
Maybe something doesn't sit right with you, but you immediately wonder if you're overreacting.
You want to say no, but then you start thinking about how the other person might feel.
You make a decision and feel good about it…until someone questions it. Suddenly, you're back in your head wondering whether you got it completely wrong.
Maybe you ask other people what they think before you even stop to ask yourself.
And after years of adjusting, accommodating, second-guessing, or trying to keep the peace, it can become really hard to tell:
What do I actually want?
You don't need someone else to make every decision for you.
You want to trust that you can listen to yourself. And also handle what happens when you do.
What if you didn’t need everyone else to agree with you before you trusted yourself?
Imagine being able to…
Say no without writing a five-paragraph explanation for why.
Make a decision without immediately asking three people if you made the right one.
Notice when something feels off—and take that feeling seriously.
Let someone be disappointed without automatically deciding you've done something wrong.
Know the difference between “I feel guilty” and “I did something wrong.”
Speak up when something hurts instead of convincing yourself it shouldn't.
Change your mind without shaming yourself for it.
Ask yourself, “What do I need?” and actually know where to begin.
So…how do we actually build self-trust?
We start getting curious about the moments when you leave yourself.
Maybe your stomach drops when someone gets upset with you and suddenly you're apologizing. Maybe you know you don't want something, but your mind immediately starts building a case for why you should. Maybe someone questions your experience and you instantly assume their version must be more accurate than yours.
Together, we'll slow those moments down.
We'll pay attention to what your body is telling you, get curious about where you learned that keeping other people comfortable was safer than listening to yourself, and practice making room for your own wants, boundaries, emotions, and instincts.
Not because your gut will always be right.
But because you deserve to have a relationship with yourself where your voice gets a seat at the table, too.
This therapy might be for you if…
You frequently ask, “Am I overreacting?” before letting yourself feel upset.
You know what you want until someone else has an opinion about it.
You ask friends, family, your partner - or chat GBT - what you should do before trusting your own judgment.
You're afraid that setting a boundary makes you selfish, difficult, or mean.
You apologize quickly when someone is upset, even when you're not sure you've done anything wrong.
You spend a lot of energy trying to predict other people's reactions.
You can identify everyone else's needs much faster than your own.
You stay in situations longer than you want to because you keep wondering if you're being “unfair.”